Sometimes, I have those days with God where I'm telling Him the way I think it should be done. Or, I can feel such hurt and pain, that I'm continually stuck in the rut of being demanding, rather than submissive. Doesn't God know that my heart hurts? He still tells me to move forward anyway, to love, to pray, to give it all to Him. When I do just as He is asking, I can see His logic, sometimes, and I can take a big sigh of relief . Or, it's just blind faith, and, I have to admit, that sometimes, His Path that He has laid out before me is scary for me. I want to take the lead. I want to control the situation. I want to inform Him of a better way!
As I was driving today and thinking about my day, my week, my stuff, I started to feel insecure and fearful. Two chapters came to mind, Romans 12 and Psalms 102. In Romans, the 1st verse it says this: "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship." In the Message I read this: "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for Him."
So, it's back to that, the everything. He wants my fear, my insecurity, my entire life! I know I can't do this, so I find myself saying, "God, help me! Help me, help me!" Because on those days when I am telling Him what to do, when I am trying to control life, and I start to think it's all about me, I need Him to help me! I need Him to carry me to the alter, and hold me. I need Him to show me all that needs to be surrendered to Him, and I need Him to take it.
The very first verse in Psalms 103 is this "God, listen! Listen to my prayer, listen to the pain in my cries." He does listen, I know that. He speaks to me, I know that too. He challenges me, all the time, and for that I praise His name.
Jesus, take the fear that creeps up so unexpectedly! Take the insecurity. Say That Again to me, You hear my cry, Your Spirit takes my cries, my thoughts, and brings them to you in words I do not have. I am here to lay before You all of this, and today I will choose to let it go.
As I was driving today and thinking about my day, my week, my stuff, I started to feel insecure and fearful. Two chapters came to mind, Romans 12 and Psalms 102. In Romans, the 1st verse it says this: "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship." In the Message I read this: "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for Him."
So, it's back to that, the everything. He wants my fear, my insecurity, my entire life! I know I can't do this, so I find myself saying, "God, help me! Help me, help me!" Because on those days when I am telling Him what to do, when I am trying to control life, and I start to think it's all about me, I need Him to help me! I need Him to carry me to the alter, and hold me. I need Him to show me all that needs to be surrendered to Him, and I need Him to take it.
The very first verse in Psalms 103 is this "God, listen! Listen to my prayer, listen to the pain in my cries." He does listen, I know that. He speaks to me, I know that too. He challenges me, all the time, and for that I praise His name.
Jesus, take the fear that creeps up so unexpectedly! Take the insecurity. Say That Again to me, You hear my cry, Your Spirit takes my cries, my thoughts, and brings them to you in words I do not have. I am here to lay before You all of this, and today I will choose to let it go.
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